I watched two people, today. They were doing something I had never even considered possible. They were dancing, clapping, waving, and – dear God – they were mooning each other! Mooning! The international gesture of male bonding!

Me, I can walk and run. Oh, and I found that I could swim the breast stroke the time I was showing off walking along a narrow wall to impress a group of Level 30 Soldiers by the river. But, this! This is new!

I stood, my expressionless arms stuck by my sides. And I watched them, in the same way a mongoloid child will watch a juggler; fascination with something surprising and new, bedazzlement with the sheer visual overload, and a pervasive smouldering jealousy that this pleasure has so far been denied them. I approached the fancy folk, and asked them what they were doing, and how I could join in.

Scenario One :
Bugner : What are you doing with the hands and the hellos?
NewFriend1 : Why, we’re waving and dancing. Would you like to wave and dance with us?
NewFriend2 : Yes, join us! And then let us retire to NewFriend1’s apartment, and smoke joints until our cares desert us!
Bugner : Bags me sitting to your left!
NewFriend2 : Ha ha, Bugner, you are wise in the ways of passing the spliff. Congratulations, and here is a shotgun.
Bugner : Bang bangs!
NewFriend1 : Bang bangs indeed!

Scenario Two :

Bugner : How did you do that? That waving thing?
Other : Type /wave.
Other2 : Type /help emote. They’re all there.

In this second way, I discovered emotes. I celebrated by having a cup of coffee and sitting down for a think. Or, should I say, sitting down for a /think? Ha, ha, ha! Yes!

Progress report : More missions, more bollocks. It's getting repetetive. The only thing that makes this game interesting - the interaction with others - is passing me by in large chunks. I am going to have to join a team mission soon.